Return Of The Street Ecstatic

I know that the proximity of other people is a stimuli for my ecstatic response. In the cloistering during the pandemic we all were removed from crowds. But in the summer of the first opening I went to an event at a local beer garden. It was the first gathering I had been to in months and just being in a congregation of folks, which I had avoided for so long, seemed to be like a dream to me.

At the venue i saw and interacted with many people I knew, sharing stories of what we had been doing during the shut down and thoughts on what  the future might hold for us. But I also began to notice that my ecstatic response was getting very much activated when passing through the crowd. It usually takes me focusing on a proven stimuli to garner an ecstatic response in myself, but sometimes, as in this moment, the response comes independently.

I decided to focus on it as I moved among the groups of people, feeling it rise in me, but trying to mitigate my involuntary movements to not draw too much attention to myself. As by course, it was very stimulating on a systemic level, physically, mentally and emotionally. i do not want to assert the occurrence of a concrete interaction as that goes outside the phenomenological logic of the ecstatic experience. However this experience of the presence of others felt very foundational and complex with a sense that I was being made aware of an immensely detailed connection.

What the ecstatic experience can show me, as it has many times before, is the contrast of it to the usual experience of daily life. I noticed the same on this occasion. I began to see how the usual ways of interacting - talking, the use of body language and such - felt as an adjunct to the much more profound presence I was also experiencing, seeing the usual way of connecting and communication as subordinate to a fuller presence and interaction, even though this usual experience is considered the paramount of personal exchange.  I could see it as narrowly defined and limited based on social structuring, a veneer to a deeper interaction that no engagement in conversation would be able to give awareness to. All the words and ideas were at best distractions to what was more fully transpiring.

After this I decided to return to venturing into public as a street ecstatic. I have done this as artistic performance and thought it important to do as I was the only person I knew of who was engaging like this. However I was now considering it more as an exercise just to reenter into this profound experience of the presence of those surrounding me. It is a way to bring it forward and eschew the normal daily life experience, which felt so constrained in contrast. The question of it being an art performance was not as important. Just realizing and honoring this rare and profound level of experience would give the exercise importance.

Some time later on I went out to the Music Concourse in Golden Gate Park to engage my ecstatic behavior in public. Although I didn’t get into any close proximity with anyone, I used the presence of others as stimuli and found the ecstatic response as by course. Some outings I may find a very pronounced response, and others less so. The exercise is about doing the best I can during that time to elicit the response. As usual people pretty much ignored me. But still I could feel the profundity of their presence within me when paying attention to those around me.

After some time of engaging on the Concourse I started to make my way out of the park. On my path I came close to and passed a group of people waiting in line to enter the Tea Garden. Although I wasn’t expressly focusing on the people at that moment, just their close proximity had the ecstatic response rise inside me. It was a wave of heightened intensity, and with widening eyes I made an effort to suppress my involuntary movements as I was passing so very close to people. This last unexpected reaction was another confirmation of the objectivity of ecstatic experience. It rises above the threshold of subjective illusion, surprising me with its occurrence and showing the actuality of its existence.